Was it a collective hallucination?!

First Dana Perino, then Mary Matalin… and now Rudy Giuliani?

Today on Good Morning America, Giuliani said:

“We had no domestic attacks under Bush; we’ve had one under Obama.”

Let me revisit the first half of this comment.

“We had no domestic attacks under Bush”

Is there anyone out there reading this blog who has forgotten that the following small matter ever took place?

Anyone remember the guy who was supposedly such a big hero for his handling of that particular crisis? The guy who subsequently got an honorary knighthood from Queen Elizabeth II? You know, that Giuliani fella?

In Mein Kampf, Adolf Hitler wrote that people will more readily accept a big lie [“Große Lüge“] than a small one, because “they would not believe that others could have the impudence to distort the truth so infamously.”

Is this what the GOP is reduced to now? It seems unlikely that three prominent conservative figures could coincidentally make the same colossal mistake within a short period of time.

Or – and here is the still more sinister idea – is this an implication that 9/11 was not in fact a terrorist attack? The conspiracy theories have been flying since about 9/12/2001, suggesting that it was an inside job of some kind. Could it be that a big reveal is on the way, and certain out-of-power figures are going to become the fall guys for it?

Giuliani surprised a few people by announcing that he would not run for any office in 2010. Is he intentionally distancing himself? Will he storm back into the 2012 field like a knight in shining armor to save his party?

Something a little odd is afoot.

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Removing Inconvenient Obstacles

When does a series of “coincidences” cease to be credible as such?

A great many prominent people have contrived to get themselves shot or otherwise removed from this mortal coil at a time when it is particularly propitious to their enemies.

Much has been written about the JFK assassination, and attempting to contain it all in a single post would likely bring even WordPress to its knees. So I won’t rehash too much of  it (here, at least) other than to highlight it as a prime example of a politically inconvenient person being removed.

Kennedy had wanted to ‘scatter the CIA to the four winds’, believing that a culture of corruption was poisoning US intelligence. A (supposedly former) CIA operative, Lee Harvey Oswald, put paid to that plan, and his act saw Kennedy replaced by the CIA-friendly Lyndon Johnson.

He also had a brother with the patently ridiculous vision of an America for all Americans, a guy who happened to be the ideal Democratic candidate for the presidency. A guy who, it emerged much later, was considering that other political nuisance MLK for his running mate. Let’s have them both shot too.

Once the Warren Commission established the Lone Gunman theory once and for all, there was still the inconvenient matter of the single person on the Commission who disagreed – House Majority Leader Hale Boggs. Not only was he unconvinced by the consensus, he was reportedly preparing a statement which would accuse then-President Richard Nixon of complicity in the assassination. He was also no fan of the FBI, going so far as to call for the resignation of J. Edgar Hoover on the floor of the Congress.

His plane went down in Alaska somewhere between Anchorage and Juneau, and was never found. More recent investigations suggest that the FBI picked up a lead on the whereabouts of the plane and of two survivors, but there is no indication of any follow-up.

Nixon himself was forced to resign due to the Watergate scandal; it has been suggested, however, that his resignation was the taking of a less damaging bullet. Had an investigation continued, it has been suggested that evidence would have been uncovered of his and LBJ’s complicity. One of the Watergate burglars, the late E. Howard Hunt, was also in Dealey Plaza when JFK was shot, but held his tongue. In case he needed convincing to hold his tongue, there was another very convenient plane crash which killed his wife as well as 11 other key figures in the Watergate conspiracy.

Boggs had been taken to the airport to start his trip by a young man named Bill Clinton. Did this young man know what was to come?

It is also known that an edit was made to the Warren report before it was released for public consumption… by one Gerald Ford.

Also of note is that an FBI memo clearly states that information regarding the Kennedy assassination was furnished to “George Bush of the Central Intelligence Agency”; could this be our 41st President? While Bush was supposedly working independently in the oil business at the time, diaries kept by Oliver North suggest that he was in fact highly placed in the CIA, and working in a covert operation regarding the Contras.

The Iran/Contra scandal, which tarnished the political careers of both Bush and his predecessor Ronald Reagan, was investigated by the Tower Commission. Are we even surprised that commission chair John Tower has since fallen victim to a plane crash?

Should we also wonder what danger was posed by Senator Wellstone before his own tragic aerial accident? Or perhaps John F. Kennedy Jr.?

Obviously all of this is conjecture. I am, however, curious to know what our current President may know about all of this. He himself was two years old at the time of the JFK assassination, of course, and even the most radical right-wingers would be hard-pressed to link him to the event. But what does he know from briefings? And what could he find out, were he to dig?

Mr. President, I’d like to know more. Please.

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Of blanketeering governors and economic collapse

Everyone remembers Client #9. The news story was almost as widespread as that “Love Potion #9” song, though there appears to be no connection.

Eliot Spitzer was governor of New York. Elected in 2006 by a comfortable margin, he came in promising reform and decency, then resigned in disgrace after a hooker blew his job. Partial credit there, Eliot.

In more detail, Spitzer failed at decency when he was caught out in a sting operation as a client of a highly paid call girl with eyes so close together that her nose had to get in the way as a referee.

The ensuing scandal brought Spitzer low, as many will remember.

BUT.

He is hardly the first public official to have – and indeed admit to – such indiscretions. The vast majority of these have kept their jobs and indeed continue to serve, sometimes admirably. The sexual peccadilloes of the governing elite are not indicative of their ability to do their jobs, after all.

So what made Eliot special?

As attorney general, Spitzer had done a great deal of good, going after big corporations with practices that hurt the little guy.

Poor phrasing there, I apologize.

As attorney general, Spitzer had done a great deal of good, going after big corporations with practices that hurt their customers and smaller competitors.

On February 14 2008, the Washington Post ran an Spitzer editorial titled, “Predatory Lenders’ Partner in Crime: How the Bush Administration Stopped the States From Stepping In to Help Consumers”. In this article, he detailed the federal derailment of his own investigations into the crisis back in 2003.

About two weeks later, he Spitzer proposed legislation which would have imposed penalties for mortgage fraud and predatory lending practices.

Needless to say, he was making himself few friends in the White House or on Wall Street. In a curious parallel (and by curious I mean blatant) his case was dealt with in DC instead of being referred to state authorities, and the first voices howling for impeachment belonged to downstate Republican members of the state legislature.

Had Spitzer been allowed to continue on his path, either in 2003 or 2008, the economic situation might have been significantly different.

Regrettably, his blanketeering gave opponents just the opening they needed in order to bring him down.

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If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck…

… it’s probably just another part of the giant government conspiracy.

I was reminded this morning of the theory that the Apollo moon landings were faked. My inner conspiracy theorist loves this one, because there’s so much you can do with it.

See, in the early 1960s, the Western World was stunned when Yuri Gagarin successfully went into orbit. The United States in particular went a little batshit over this news, largely because the nascent NASA had had a great deal of money pumped into it, and here the Russians were launching a machine which surely had to be predominantly made of duct tape – and there was a cosmonaut IN it. Kennedy, in his optimistic fashion, called for the United States to put a man on the surface of the moon by the end of the decade.

Shouldn’t have been difficult, one would think. After all, we had access to the technology salvaged at Roswell, NM, back in 1947, and had been having dialogue with several different races of alien life for some time. Trouble was, a great deal of that technology was under the control of the CIA. Kennedy and the CIA didn’t get along too well, as evidenced by the fact that he planned to dissolve the Agency entirely.

Lo and behold, in November ’63, a magic bullet came from three different locations at once, entered Kennedy’s head at the wrong angle for any of said locations, and the alchemical ritual killing of the Divine King was completed.

CIA-trained operative Lee Harvey Oswald, observing this while still trying to get a good visual through his Mannlicher-Carcano rifle, is reported to have said “OMG WTF?” Meanwhile, CIA-trained operative James Files calmly left the scene, his own gun still in hand, and the mission was accomplished.

Future Agency Director George Scherf Jr., during the course of the investigation, requested that all pertinent documents be turned over to him, a request which was duly honored. It should be noted that George Scherf Jr. was no longer under that name at this time, hence the record showing that the documents were provided to ‘George Bush of the CIA’. This individual, it should be noted, went on to become the nation’s 41st President.

The furore over Kennedy’s assassination allowed the CIA to continue its operations without hindrance, especially since the views of one Lyndon Baines Johnson were rather more friendly to the CIA. Nonetheless, in order to continue deflecting attention from the perpetrators of perhaps the single greatest con of all time, Kennedy’s memory needed to be kept alive. And so it was that a TV studio of sorts was set up at a base in Nevada, not far from Groom Lake.

It should also be noted at this point that there are few better ways for a shaky administration to get the public firmly behind them than by providing a common enemy. A military action was quickly contrived and the United States entered Vietnam.

A growing counterculture movement, featuring the likes of LSD pioneer Timothy Leary, protested vociferously against the war, never realizing that they were simply being distracted from the assimilation of the entire country by the New World Order, with the help of the CIA as well as high-standing politicians from both sides of the partisan divide.

Though the enduring popularity of the Beatles threatened their Machiavellian machinations, the NWO quickly devised counter-strategies. The assassination of Paul McCartney and his replacement with their own lookalike (William Campbell) kept the Beatles from getting too outspoken, although Mark Chapman would eventually need to be deployed also once the Beatles had broken up.

What about the Moon landings? We’re coming back to that.

The public was beginning to embrace the counterculture more strongly than anticipated, and the Russians were starting to get their act together. Something needed to happen at this point to re-establish American superiority. And so it was that a little movie was made. A gentleman named Kubrick was drafted to make the landing look as realistic as possible, and a great script was put together.

Getting up onto a stage was one small step for a man. Getting that movie out was a giant leap for the NWO.

NOTE: The above is a work of fiction and is provided for entertainment purposes only. Allegedly.

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